Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Men Folk on the Journey

I love this post (from a husband's perspective) on what it's like when a wife speaks about wanting to cover. I love the honesty that Rick shows in this post, and I love that he and and his wife, Melly Elizabeth, are on this journey together.

Oh goodness, God is so patient with us! Rick's testimony surely reveals this, and I think we can all see it in our own lives. Years ago, when I wanted to go from full time work outside of the home, to part time work outside of the home, Ashunoah really struggled. At one point, when I was immature and self-seeking, I went to work part time, anyway, not bothered much by what he thought of it. Oh, and you must know how ashamed I am of that. Eventually, I went back to full time. After some time had passed, I told him I'd like to go part time again (this was long before the kids), and wondered what he'd think of it. This time, I was committed to only going part time if he said I could. I continued working full time till he gave me the okay. Some time had passed and he got into some good conversations with another godly, male friend of his who asked him just how much he really trusted in the Lord's provision if he was afraid for me to work part time outside the home. Some things in that conversation really hit home for him and he began to do a turnaround. After a while, we were both settled and content with me working part time, and God was providing for us just fine! I even continued working part time when I became a mom for the first time (that was by choice on my part, as I was in something of a verbal commitment with campus ministy work); but by the time our youngest came along, we both knew that working outside of the home was out of the question. Since then, I've been happily at home with my boys. We've certainly had some challenges, but God has helped us through every one of them.

I see Ashunoah warming up to my headcovering, in a subtle sort of way. He works in appliance repair, and if he goes to the home of a couple where the wife is a headcovering woman, he takes special note. When he comes home, he tells me about it, and says, "You would have liked her. She was all covered up." or he might say something like, "Yeah, she was Muslim. I was asking about her headcovering and I told her about your covering and she was very interested."

I don't doubt that many husbands find it hard at first to accept the idea of their wives covering. It's weird. A little off-center. What will folks say? I think in many ways our men folk are on a journey of their own when it comes to our covering. I'm confident that many husbands just want to do what God wants them to do; some come huffin' and puffin', some come humbly with teachable hearts. Wherever they are on the journey, they need our prayers, our love, our submission and our respect. I'm also confident that most wives know that nagging and self-seeking attitudes get us no where fast. Otherwise, what's the point of the covering? As one dear blogger wrote recently (quoting from Amy's blog From this Minute), “I love the face of a nun. The glow. I know my headcovering doesn’t automatically give me that. I may dress the part sometimes, but I still have a lot of work to do. You have to earn holiness. If I can just be a fraction of the person I dress like. That’s what I pray for. What I commit to each day. Just a little bit like that person.”

So well said!


Momma Jo said...

I came across your blog and this post today. Thanks for sharing your journey. You can read how God has put this on my heart and in the comments of my post the struggle with my husband not desiring for me to do it. Please be in prayer! Thanks!

Muhala Akamau said...

Momma Jo,
Been to your spot and find it to be a most lovely place...I won't be a me!


Momma Jo said...

Dear Muhala Akamau,
Thanks for the words of encouragement you left on my blog and for any prayers. You brought tears to my eyes literally. It's so encouraging to know someone else can relate to the journey I'm on... and I know there are other women too.
Yesterday I had a lot of dialogue with my husband on this issue again and how I was struggling in wanting to show him respect yet also wanting to be obedient to the call God put on my heart. I wouldn't say he gave me his blessing but he said with great exasperation if it's that big of a deal do it! So today is the first step of obedience to the call to cover that God stirred in my heart. I'm praying my husband will come to understand and repect my obedience.

Anonymous said...

I stumbled across your blog today, and I really enjoyed reading it. Thank you for sharing yourself with us. Blessings for all you do.

Muhala Akamau said...

Thanks so much for your kind are always most welcome here. God's grace to you on your journey.